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Eleanor felt the telephoto lens click and Constantine s face changed into Jacob s. It clicked again and changed back to Constantine. Maniacal laughter echoed all around her as the lens clicked back and forth too fast for her eyes to focus. A scream tore from her throat. Ellie, Ellie honey, wake up. Eleanor shot up in bed, still screaming. Her heart raced and her nightgown was drenched. Ellie, it s me, Alice. Are you okay? You were having one of those dreams again. Eleanor looked at Alice, trying to focus. Part of her was back in the bedroom with Constantine, or was it Jacob? Alice took her in her arms. Oh, Ellie, this is my fault. If I d only been stronger, none of this would have happened. I m so sorry. What can I do for you? Would you like a glass of water? Eleanor nodded, unable to speak because the shaking had started. That s always the next step, the shaking. Soon I ll start to calm down. Just hang on a few more minutes. Keep it together until Alice leaves. Alice came back with a glass of water and Eleanor took it gratefully. The cool water soothed her scream-raw throat. Ellie, I really think you should see a doctor about this. Alice sat on the bed. You need some help. Bobby knows a few people you could go to. I know you mean well, but I don t think any doctor is going to be able to help me. The shaking was getting easier to manage. She could feel her muscles starting to relax. Almost over. Look, Alice, it s three-thirty in the morning. How about we try to get some 84 Dyad Dreams sleep and talk about this in the morning? Do you go back to sleep after these nightmares? Sure, I sleep like a baby. Go back to bed and thanks for waking me up. Tears filled her sister s eyes. Oh, Ellie, I wish you d let me help you. Nothing you can do this time. Now go to bed. I ll see you in the morning. Alice gave her another quick hug and left the room. Alone, Eleanor could release the tears she d been holding back. She cried now as she always did, silently. The tears ran down her cheeks with only sharp intakes of breath to accompany them. Hopeless crying. She couldn t muster enough energy for a good weep. It wasn t the good old-fashioned crying jags she used to have. When those were over, she d felt cleansed and renewed. These were fruitless, pathetic descents into despair and she hated giving in to them. Getting up, she went into the bathroom, splashed cold water on her face and toweled dry. Movement in the mirror caught her eye and it took her a few seconds to realize the tired, haggard-looking woman was her. Hello, beautiful, she said. Lucky I m a voice artist and not a model. The dark circles under her eyes had reached biblical proportions. Limp, dull hair framed her pinched, almost unrecognizable face. She even thought her eye color had faded. Maybe Alice was right. Maybe she should see a doctor. But what would she say? Well, Doc, it s like this. Three months ago I met a man who I think is the love of my life. I only knew him three days, but big deal. Shit happens. He felt real bad about leaving me, but he had to go off with his partner, the atmosphere-changing, power- wielding, Moby-Dick-reading member of a secret race of people who can suck the youth out of us. So, okay, Doc, do you have a pill for that, or do I just exercise more and think happy thoughts? Yeah, that would go over like a lead balloon. At best, she d be put on some medication that didn t let her feel anything, at worst, she d be put in a nice home somewhere so she couldn t hurt herself or scare the nice people. Anyway, she couldn t tell a doctor anything. She d promised Damien she would keep it secret. I don t understand, she thought for the hundredth time. Everything had been fine at first. Sure, she was hurt, angry and very disappointed when Jacob left. But after a few days without his presence to remind her, she d convinced herself she d imagined how good it had been between them. Everything had gone back to normal. Detectives Comstock and Farmer accepted the story they d concocted. That is, they left it alone after Eleanor called in a favor from Mr. Montgomery, City Council member. She knew Detective Comstock didn t believe it. After four days of Eleanor, Alice and Bobby sticking to their story about an anonymous tip, and Alice being too drugged to recall what had happened, Detective Farmer had washed his hands of the case. Comstock had pulled Eleanor aside for a private discussion. Look, he said, giving 85 Ann Hinnenkamp her a hard-assed stare. If you think I buy this for one second, you re wrong. To begin with, your sister can t lie worth a damn. And you and that Bobby fella have been so jumpy, I m expecting you to explode any minute. So let s just get that straight right now, okay. I m not buying. Each word of the last sentence was accented by his fist pounding the desk in front of him. But I m only a lowly detective. There s not much I can do when you start calling in favors from somebody like Montgomery. So I m going to drop it. But let me tell you this. If one more woman goes missing like your sister, I m going to be back on the three of you like flies on shit. You got that, Miss Hennen? Yes, Detective, Eleanor said, meekly. She knew when not to press her advantage. I don t like to be made a fool of, that s all. He got up and opened his office door. Now get out of here before I change my mind. Eleanor almost ran out of the police station. After that, Eleanor went back to her life. At her request, her agent booked as many jobs as he could for her. Even jobs she would usually turn down, just to keep busy. Afraid to sit alone and brood, she met friends for lunch and dinner and broke her personal record by going to four movies in one week. It was bittersweet to watch Alice and Bobby together. They were so happy in their newfound love. Eleanor lost track of the times she walked into a room and saw them jump apart. The first time had been weird. Seeing her sister and best friend kissing all hot and heavy was odd on a few different levels. But it was hard to keep feeling that way when she saw how they were with each other. Just like Mom and Dad, she thought. A part of her couldn t help but feel jealous. It just wasn t for the obvious reason. She was jealous because she was not the number one person in either of their lives anymore. They d replaced her with each other. There was no room between the two of them for her anymore. It was lonely, being on the outside looking in. Sometimes it seemed their happiness intensified her unhappiness by comparison. She d been worried about Alice at first. When Bobby wasn t around, she d find her sister sitting alone, deep in thought, her face looking haunted. Eleanor would always [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ] |